Handling Stress Like Jesus

Stress, like love, is universal. Because it is universal, most people can relate when the common phrase, “I am stressed out” or “I am overwhelmed” is used when a friend asks for an update on life. Aside from the word “stress” being tossed around at most post-workday gatherings at the local wine-and-dine restaurants as a response to “How are you?”, the overwhelmed feeling is often the reason so many see a therapist or a motivating factor for why we leave a high-paying job; it can also often be a debilitating reason we remove ourselves from social circles, a great relationship, or a reminder of why our childhood was considered traumatic. Stress is so powerful, we often get prescribed medications by our doctor in order to prevent long-term and short-term anxiety, depression, or worse, thoughts of suicide.

In healthy Christian circles, stress is met with prayer, intervention of the Holy Spirit, meditating on the Word and promises of God, and even innocent fun activities such as ax throwing, getting a manicure, or grilling with friends and family to wash away some of that stress. Some of those fun, innocent activities also happens in secular circles, but the point is, stress can run and ruin lives if not properly handled with care. Growing up, my dad made sure to enlighten me by explaining the difference between stress and stressed out, the former often motivating us to do what needs to be done and even reminding us that we need the S-word to discover the potential we have to reach our goals. We are stressed because we care about the outcome, essentially. 

However, we stress out because we let the fear of the worst-case scenario will become a reality and ruin our lives, or at least traumatize us for 10-20 years. Anyone who loves you and wants what’s best for you would hope you avoid feeling stressed out at all costs. Unfortunately, “stressed out” is what Satan finds most amusing because it is at this point where temptation appears more satisfying than the Truth itself (see Matthew 4 as a reference). Stressed out does not happen without stress first taking root. Stressed out is stress out of control. Paul, in 2 Corinthians 10, says that to wage war against the powers of the world by demolishing arguments and claims against God starts when we “take captive every thought to make it obedient to Christ” (verse 5), because the Gospel of Jesus Christ is persuasive when you observe the Truth of who God is, and when you allow your thought life to turn from disobedience and turn towards the Truth, the evidence of God’s narrative will speak for itself in a mighty way – mightier than any weapon the world uses. Stressed out occurs when we do not take an active, offensive approach to the thoughts that flood our minds when we are stressed. Paul says we need to take captive our thoughts because, just like stress, when we don’t submit our thoughts to God, it can become a destructive weapon that can not only destroy us and the great blessings God gives us (e.g. relationships, friendships, vocations, the will of God, etc.), but our relationship with God. 

If we are not careful, our thoughts in the stressed stage could set up an argument and pretense against God – example: Going from “Why would you do this to me God?” to “You are not a good God, because you allow this to happen in my life.” When we are stressed out, and continue to let our thoughts wander down dangerous roads, we become undisciplined in measuring up the thoughts we think and the feelings we feel to the Truth of God. In addition, we forget that Jesus experienced it too! Let’s take a look at where Jesus experienced arguably the most intense form of stressed out in his lifetime. 

Sure, I would be stressed out if Satan approached me in the wilderness after 40 days and 40 nights of fasting, but I am not referring to Matthew 4, when the ”tempter” came to Jesus to convince him to jump of cliffs and turn stones to bread. Instead, let’s look at the stress Jesus felt right before (12-15 hours before he was arrested) his captors had seized him in order to be crucified on the cross: 

 “They went to a place called Gethsemane, and Jesus said to his disciples, ‘Sit here while I pray.’ He took Peter, James and John along with him, and he began to be deeply distressed and troubled. ‘My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death,’ he said to them. ‘Stay here and keep watch.’ Going a little farther, he fell to the ground and prayed that if possible the hour might pass from him. ‘Abba, Father,’ he said, ‘everything is possible for you. Take this cup from me. Yet not what I will, but what you will.’ Then he returned to his disciples and found them sleeping. ‘Simon,’ he said to Peter, ‘are you asleep? Couldn’t you keep watch for one hour? Watch and pray so that you will not fall into temptation. The spirit is willing, but the flesh is weak.’” – Mark 14:32-37 

The big argument I have heard when people feel immense amount of stress – you can call it stressed out or distressed, but, in my opinion, they mean the same thing – is that “no one knows or understands what I’m going through.” However, not only did Jesus feel copious amounts stress, but he admitted to Peter, James, and John before his arrest, “My soul is crushed with grief to the point of death (Mark 14:34 NLT)” To me, that sounds like stressed out; another version, the NIV, translated, “…[Jesus] began to be deeply distressed and troubled, ‘My soul is overwhelmed with sorrow…” If I were to describe my stress using other words, I may speak like Jesus did here, though if I were to speak of death within the same breath, I would be exaggerating. However, I don’t think Jesus was exaggerating, and if I were about to be handed over and arrested by my “betrayer” (Mark 14:42) in order to be crucified and tortured to death, I would probably compare my grief and distress to death as well. 

According to www.ncbi.nlm.nih.gov, “Stress responses are normal reactions to environmental or internal perturbations and can be considered adaptive in nature. Distress occurs when stress is severe, prolonged, or both.” In my opinion, this sounds like stressed out. An article about stress and grief from www.webmd.com says, “Stress links the emotional and physical aspects of grief.” Meaning, the grief Jesus probably experienced caused more stress and tension physically and emotionally. Whether we use distressed, stressed out, or grief to describe our intense level of stress, it sounds like semantics to me. The point is, Jesus was so stressed out about his impending, inevitable betrayal and death, that he was feeling the weight and pressure the grief and distress was having on him before the events even unfolded. 

Since stress is universal, and we all experience varying degrees of it, let’s take a look at how Jesus handled the most intense version of it (both physically and emotionally): 

1. He admitted his pain 

2. He approached God with it; he prayed 

3. He worshipped God by declaring what God can do and what he is capable of 

4. Despite his stress, he honored God through commitment to the original plan – he did not forget what God’s plan was 

5. He accepted his role and did not complain 

Instead of using our stress as justification to attack God and demand that either he fix the situation or we threaten to cease the relationship, we should take notes on how Jesus handled a level of stress beyond our own comprehension: he dealt with rejection and betrayal from his closest friends, was publicly humiliated, and sacrificed eternity in Heaven for earthly humiliation and suffering. His mission to set the captives free from the bondage of sin required a crown of thorns and unimaginable pain – physical, emotional, psychological. If anyone knew stress to its fullest extent, it was Jesus. And if Jesus could get past his stress to complete the mission, we can too. 

How? For starters, Jesus prioritized his commitment to the will of the Father. Jesus demonstrated what a life centered on God looks like, and his focus was unwavering. In the book of John alone, check out how Jesus humbly credits the Father during his ministry: 

1. “…I speak what the Father has taught me. The one who sent me is with me; he has not left me alone, for I always do what pleases him” - John 8:28-29 

2. “…now the Son of Man is glorified and God is glorified in him” - John 13:31 

3. “…so that the Father may be glorified in the Son.” – John 14:13 

4. “…if you loved me, you would be glad I am going to the Father, for the Father is greater than I.” – John 14:28 

5. “…I love the Father and do exactly what my Father has commanded me.” – John 14:31 

6. “This is to my Father’s glory, that you bear much fruit…” – John 15:8 

If we track the life of Jesus, we see how he handled the pressure he was put under: he immersed himself in the community around him with his disciples, he worshipped God the Father and credited Him for his ministry, and he walked with humility and gratitude. Jesus models in each of these verses that God deserves the glory and praise through sickness, health, suffering, victory, and in this case, stress. We may not have all of the answers, and sometimes we may hear ourselves utter a paraphrased version of “take this cup from me” when we feel “overwhelmed with sorrow to the point of death.” Yet, despite how we feel in the moment of stress, we can still find the strength to say, “not my will, but what God will.”

Is it easier said than done? Absolutely, but at a minimum, we can rest in the plans of God in the midst of our stress, for He alone is the strength we need to overcome the worst of days. Amen!

Jesus is Like Honey

It was 2017, and I had a lot of trouble keeping up with expiration dates of food I bought. I am pretty sure I had diced tomatoes in the pantry from 2013 after digging to the way back. As I am pulling out food to throw away, Kevin, my best friend and roommate at the time, didn’t know whether to laugh at my irresponsible behavior or remain shocked that I could not keep track of the food I bought five years prior.

Through the chuckles, he said, “You have to stick to food that never expires, bro.”

I replied, “Like what? What foods do not ever expire.”

His words stumbled out of his mouth as I knew he didn’t have an answer. Finally, he muttered, “I don’t know, honey. Honey never expires.”

Five years later, I recall that moment in the pantry. When I read about Jesus telling the crowd near Capernaum that he is the bread of life and that the one who “eats the bread will live forever,” (John 6:58) and that Jesus is “the bread of life. Whoever comes to [him] will never grow hungry and whoever believes in [him] will never be thirsty” (John 6:35), I thought about honey. Since I am no honey connoisseur, I saw the first answer that appeared on my iPhone. According to wellandgood.com, “Honey never expires…” when “…Kept sealed in an airtight container…even if it crystalizes or darkens over time.”

Not only was Kevin right about honey never expiring, but when properly taken care of, it still holds its value even after visual signs indicate it appears inedible over time.

The more I thought about this idea of honey, Kevin’s conversation with me, and the comparison it could have to Jesus’ words to the crowd about never growing hungry or thirsty, the clearer the picture became to me:

Milk, after time, becomes moldy and curdles; strawberries grow white mold on them after being in the refrigerator too long. Chicken gets poisoned and becomes toxic to eat after 3-5 days after cooked. Even soda goes flat after being opened and sits around for a while. Honey is eternal. Honey is dependable and reliable. Further, if used properly and kept sealed in an airtight container, honey lasts forever. Just like honey, the Word of God and the love of the Father never goes bad; it never becomes worthless, a waste of space. His words and promises never grow stale like Wonder bread. It never collects flies like fruit on the countertop. Jesus is dependable and reliable because he is eternal and the truth that will set us free from bondage.

How do we receive the sweetness of honey? We make use of it in our lives by applying it to the cereal, biscuits, yogurt parfaits, tea, cookies, etc. How do we receive the goodness and eternal life through Jesus – we make use of the Truth he presents to us in our lives by applying it to every situation and circumstance. We allow Him, like honey does to our diet, to change us from the inside out. If we do not let our diet be filled with the sweetness of honey, honey is no longer connected to us and we are no longer influenced by it. If we sever ourselves from connection with Jesus, who does not expire or change for the worst, we lose that influence he has over us. We gravitate towards idols that crumble, fall, and destroy us. John 15:4 says, “Remain in me, and I will remain in you. For a branch cannot produce fruit if it is severed from the vine, and you cannot be fruitful unless you remain in me.”

We must allow the sweetness of Jesus to not just transform us, but forever transform our diet. He must invade the pantry of our heart, and once we make a habit of doing this, it will never expire when he is properly hidden within our hearts and shared to the world as the Good News. Psalm 119:11 says, I have hidden your word in my heart, that I might not sin against you.” Let us not hold back on making Jesus, the honey that never expires, the central focus of our lives, the one we aim to glorify and please, and the most satisfactory aspect of our pantry.

Experiencing God's Goodness in the Midst of Trial

Pretend with me for a moment. You have a career. You’re not just any employee, you’re well liked, dependable, approachable, and coachable. In two days, your boss, who loves you, is going to congratulate you on a pay raise because the work you’ve done over the past month has made you an asset to the company and deserving of a pay raise.

You also attend a church whose values line up with yours, and the community you surround yourself with is also a big part of this church. In addition, this church you attend has a hipster name, like Gethsemane, and serves coffee before every service. It’s obviously a highly-favored church with a name like Gethsemane.

Moving to your friend group. Most of your tight-knit circle is from church, with the exception of a few coworkers and friends from the weekend tennis club you joined last month. Because of your vibrant personality, you make friends quickly because you are so well liked. Thanks to Instagram, your spouse is well liked too, and you have to set reminders on your phone to ensure the topic does not revolve around him in all conversations with your friends.

Ok, you get the gist. You have a good life. You have the kind of life that allows you to play cornhole at a BBQ you hosted for your church-going Christian friends while also setting aside enough time to minister to your work friends, see your mentor on a weekly basis, attend a small group led by an elder of the church you go to, and go on some quality time dates with your spouse. There’s a lot of good going on that even your best friend would have to go deep sea diving to find something wrong with your life.

But say something did go wrong. For the sake of the point, we’re not going to list the endless possibilities and combinations of what could derail a perfect life. What do you do when something disrupts it?

Unfortunately, it is often the case that the God we praise on Sunday mornings quickly becomes the subject of attack. Suddenly, the God we discuss at 7pm Tuesday night “Life Group” becomes the Customer Service Complaint Center. Worse, our prayers turn into temper tantrums that would make any bystander question your friendship with God to begin with.

Does this sound too harsh? Unfortunately, even if these situation are not spot on, they set an example for how we treat God when our faith in him is put to the test. When we behave like this, we step off the rocky foundation our house should be built on (Matthew 7:24). We even sometimes look up at the house we built on the rock, shake our finger at it, and start building sandcastles below it. Once the waves crash in, we pout, whine, moan and groan as if the house we built our life on during the good times does not exist.

My dad would always address my stormy seasons with John 16:33 growing up: “In this world, you will have trouble. But take heart, I have overcome the world.” He would address me and my hard times with this Bible verse because he knew there was something greater we had in Jesus. Our friendship with Jesus is the house built on rock. Any time we take our eyes off Jesus during any personal crisis, epidemic, or pandemic which might stir up fear and doubt, we start building new houses on sand without God. The harsh reality is that some of us who say we are Christians during “Christmastime” seasons are waging war with God during the “Stormy” seasons. To that I say, “Choose a side!” If you accept God into your heart during the good, this does not automatically withhold you from experiencing pain; what it does do is give you a place of refuge in the midst of the battles, storms, and painful seasons of life. It give you a place to stand when the Devil commands you to sit. It give you a house to reside in whose foundation rests on a rock where no storm can wipe it out.

And when we build our house on the rock, we are building it upon the truth of God, in the good and bad seasons of life. In the seasons where we feel like our world is being flipped upside down and during seasons of victory. John Piper wrote a book during the COVID-19 pandemic of 2020 called, Coronavirus and Christ. In it, he asserts, “Our heart says ‘yes! We have tasted and seen’ [that the Lord is good (Psalm 34:8)]…the knowing is well founded. We are not leaping in the dark.” The firm foundation built on rock is tasting and seeing the Lord is good no matter how our seasons pan out. Why? Because our firm foundation is ‘well founded.’

During my troubles, dad emphasized the fact that the world’s troubles will never amount to the love and care we have in Jesus. In Jesus, we are cared for beyond any trouble that will come our way. In this world, we will always come out victorious, even if it feels like we have lost too much. The first part of John 16:33 is equally applicable: “I have told you these things so that you may have peace.” When do we need the most peace? When we’re feeling anxious, scared, and filled with worry! When do we have anxiety and fear? In the midst of our personal storms. Our personal storms are when we need the peace of God to “transcend all understanding…so that [his peace] will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus” (Philippians 4:7). The peace of God, which has overcome the world, is the rock which we build our foundation on. In fact, we know that God’s peace is a major part of our foundation because that is what Jesus left us with before he ascended to heaven after his resurrection: “I am leaving you with a gift – peace of mind and heart. And the peace I give you is a gift the world cannot give” (John 14:27). We can weather any storm with this gift. “Live or die, you will be with [God]…this is a firm rock under my feet. It is not fragile, not sand,” Piper writes in his book. Much like building our foundation on rock, the rock represents knowing God is in control whether we live or die. “Live or die, you will be with me” is having the peace of mind in the here and now because his will is for us to be with and him with us; that he loves us and will protect us at all costs.

Where this is illustrated perfectly, in a small yet profound moment, is in Genesis 22, when Abraham starts one of his days with an interesting command from God. “Take your son, your only son, whom you love…Sacrifice him there as a burnt offering on a mountain I will show you.” ‘Interesting’ is a word that does not even do justice to describe the magnitude of that request. It is interesting enough for God to command any father to kill his son, but at this point in the Bible story, God is asking Abraham to sacrifice the one son he blessed Sarah and Abraham with at old age.

The absurdity of this command has multiple layers. First, what kind of loving God would ask you to sacrifice a young child, let alone your own child whom you love deeply? Second, Abraham and Sarah gave birth to Isaac after a long life without children together. Isaac was the only child given to the both of them by God, and right when you thought the layers of this command couldn’t make it more otherworldly than it already is, Abraham and Sarah were around 100 years old when they finally had a child to call their own (Genesis 21:1-7).

So, when Genesis 22 does not waste any time introducing us with God telling Abraham to replace the animal sacrifices with his son Isaac, it makes you wonder what was actually going through Abraham’s mind when the very next verse explains that he went straight to loading his donkey the following morning (see Genesis 22:3) in preparation to sacrifice his only son as a burnt offering.

Does Abraham ever think, Yeah God, I’m going to have to pass on that, or Am I hearing you correctly God? We can only infer that Abraham’s obedience to God is a measure of the level of faith he has that God can be trusted. “Faith had taught him not to argue, but to obey,” Matthew Henry writes in his commentary of Genesis 22. Faith is the assurance that what “God commands is good.” Do our strong trials exercise our strong faith and trust in God, or does it bring forth doubt, defiance, and lack of reverence?

Sometimes, our faith and assurance in the goodness of God must extend beyond one moment and one season. The trip to Moriah that God commanded Abraham to go to was not a three hour hike. According to Genesis 22:4, it was the third day of Abraham and Isaac’s journey before he even saw the place where Isaac would be sacrificed. By day three, Abraham only saw the place, so it had to have taken more than three days to get there. Regardless of whether it took three days or more, Matthew Henry concludes that three days symbolized a “time to consider and might deliberately obey.”

Whether you are waiting for a life-long partner, moving on from heartbreak, a pandemic to end, a secure career to line up in your favor, moving into a stable living condition, a three day trip to Moriah looks quite different to you. Whatever your season looks like, in your moments of uncertainty and time of deliberation, do you still hold true to the promises of God? Do you still believe God’s goodness will reign supreme? In the three day journey, God could have stopped Abraham and said, “Don’t do it! Don’t kill your son!” In the three days, Abraham could have argued with God, telling him, “If you’re a good God, you would provide a sheep to take the place of Isaac!”

We do that with God. Often, our prayers sound more like courtroom accusations than an act of faith and reverence to the Lord’s will. We question his authority and sovereignty as if our bitter words will jolt him out of his apathetic attitude towards humanity and force him to do something that aligns with our desires. We don’t trust God’s narrative, so we label him a lazy, untrustworthy God for not changing it for our benefit. At best, we give God the silent treatment until he is worthy of praise.

But what if, instead of trying to force God to change his narrative through fighting words, we trusted in the promises of God throughout his narrative? Take a look at how Abraham responds when his son asks him about the sacrifice:

“Isaac turned to Abraham and said, ‘Father?’

‘Yes, my son?’

‘We have the fire and the wood,’ the boy said, ‘but where is the sheep for the burnt offering?’

‘God will provide a sheep for the burnt offering, my son…’”

This dialogue between father and son is so powerful because it is the definition of faith and trust within the story. God will provide. There is no time to argue with God, so in my obedience, I will trust that God knows best. This is Abraham’s mindset towards God. Abraham only knew that he was supposed to kill his son. He did not yet know God would provide an animal sacrifice to replace Isaac. But faith knew. Faith in the goodness of God knew. The story ends with God providing a ram for Abraham to take the place of Isaac so he wouldn’t have to die. Furthermore, Abraham is blessed beyond measure for his faith that God would spare Isaac. “Because you have obeyed me and have not withheld even your son, your only son, I swear by my own name that I will certainly bless you” (Gen. 22:16-17). And bless Abraham he did; with a number of descendants so great, Abraham couldn’t even count them.

Not once did Abraham question God, argue with God, or belittle God in this passage because of faith and a knowledge of God’s character. There is something powerful about standing true to what you know about God and not letting circumstances interfere with how you see him.

Your faith, trust, and reverence towards God should be the most important aspect of each season. Your circumstances shouldn’t determine your view of God; your allegiance to God should be the lens you view your circumstances through. Let the character of God guide you through the pay raises and the heartbreaks of life. Allow the Holy Spirit to guide you, whether your life is viewed as flawless or you’ve hit rock bottom. The goodness of God does not change because circumstances do. No matter which direction your life is headed, let God be the consistent beacon of hope in every season, because he is a perfect God who will guide us through every troubling experience we face.

What your belief and trust in God will do is allow you to overcome every obstacle that stands in your way because your faith is grounded in a powerful God who can help you weather any storm. You are armed with peace, understanding, patience, and strength when you press into the goodness of God and not let your current situation define the sovereignty of God. With God, all things are possible, and you can rest in knowing that no storm is too big for him.

Check out this video link that explains my view on COVID-19 and Genesis 22